Kyle and Kendall. No, that’s not a misspelling. They are boots from Steve Madden. Very similar in style. I just couldn’t decide on which ones from seeing them online.
So, I did a normal thing. I walked into a store. I asked to try on both in my size. When she asked if I liked them, my anxiety shot up. Yes, I did like both. And no, I wasn’t interested in getting either.
My goals were to figure out my size and figure out which I liked best to buy online another time. I felt especially terrible when she said it was Buy One Get The Second Pair Half Off. I responded with: Oh, good thing I’m considering two!
My next thoughts:
Fuck. I got her hopes up. I’m not going to buy these. Like, not even close. $150+ on two shoes, no. Not today. I’m such a jerk.
When she walked into the back of the store to grab another pair for another customer, I knew it was my chance to bolt. And bolt, I did. Out. So quickly, I didn’t realize that I had left my Nalgene water bottle on the bench until I was too far gone.
Fuck. A mistake. Imperfection. Yet, mistakes are okay. Accepting my anxiety in those moments, that’s okay too. It’s all okay. Time to get another Nalgene.