By chance, I happened to use the restroom during my consultation visit. There was a small sign that encouraged timeliness. 15 before your first appointment to fill out paperwork. 10 before your regular appointment. And 5 minutes of waiting grace.
I showed up 10 minutes early to the first zap. My appointment was at 13:45. I didn’t get acknowledged for waiting until 13:55. And I was asked to the room around 14:00.
The woman in scrubs led me in. Asked a few questions. Asked me to undress and wait for her return with the iPad to Facetime another nurse.
I kid you not. I Facetimed a nurse that asked me two questions. How did I know she was a nurse? Because she wore glasses? Because the other woman kept referring to her as a nurse? Because she was very serious in asking me those two questions.
How many sessions did you get? 8.
On a scale of 1 to 10, what are you feeling for pain? 3.
Wait that was it. One armpit done. Oh. That was a 2.
Next armpit. More small talk.
Are you Caucasian, Italian or Puerto Rican? Umm.
She wanted me to show her how far my hair grew out to.
I nonverbally answered.
You’re all done.
That was so fast. That was too fast? Did you cut it short because you knew I had 8 sessions?
Most uncomfortable moment: speaking to an Ipad.